GETTING YOUR HOMELESS CAT ACCUSTOMED TO HIS NEW ENVIRONMENT
The first week or two with a homeless cat are always the hardest. Despite having food and shelter, your homeless cat might crave the struggling life he came from, purely out of habit. This is completely normal. Look for little signs, such as your homeless cat stealing cigarettes or sitting inside old cheap bags near the exit of your garden.
IS YOUR HOMELESS CAT PUTTING ON A FALSE FRONT FOR YOUR BENEFIT?
Once settled into your household, your homeless cat might pretend to relax, just because he doesn’t want to worry you and is keen to fit in. Remember: he might look loose and floppy but is probably deeply stressed underneath and turning the world’s problems over in his anxious mind.
YOUR HOMELESS CAT AND THE INTERNET
Homeless cats almost never have access to the Internet. To boost your homeless cat’s self-esteem and make him feel part of the modern world, make a web page for him. Here, for example, is my homeless cat looking pleased after I have helped him start his own lifestyle and fashion blog.
TEACHING YOUR HOMELESS CAT ABOUT NATURE
Psychologically, being a homeless cat can be incredibly traumatic. A good way to help your homeless cat get over this is to have a ‘nature day’ together. Head to the nearest nice bit of countryside near your house and walk your homeless cat unhurriedly around it, being careful to notice the beauty of the landscape and simple, wonderful things, such as flowers and butterflies.
COMFORTING YOUR HOMELESS CAT AT BEDTIME
If your homeless cat is sleeping with his paws over his eyes, this probably means he is dreaming about bad things, such as being chased by a badger, having to break into an out-of-service bus to find somewhere to sleep, or the prospect of five more years of a Conservative government. If so, try not to wake him, but gently place a blanket over him to offer him some comfort in his night-time torment.
YOUR HOMELESS CAT AND MUSIC
Most domesticated cats like complicated jazz or edgy music made in urban areas, but homeless cats tend to prefer the more bucolic, dropout music of the 1960s counterculture, which speaks to them more directly. Play lots of this music to your homeless cat. This will make your homeless cat feel simultaneously more at home and more himself.
THE SURPRISING SOPHISTICATED SIDE OF YOUR HOMELESS CAT
It might be tempting to offer your homeless cat very basic drinks at first, such as Special Brew, Kestrel lager or some old rainwater that has pooled outside the house in a disused bin lid. Many homeless cats will feel deeply patronised by this, and actually far prefer the chance to indulge in a sophisticated glass of Pinot Grigio or filtered tap water.
STEERING YOUR HOMELESS CAT TOWARDS A MORE MINDFUL LIFE
Meditation is a great way to calm your homeless cat’s mind. Many cities and small towns run meditation classes nowadays, especially if you live in the South West of England. Alternatively, light a candle, put on some soothing whale music and encourage your cat to meditate at home. If all goes to plan, soon he will have stopped dwelling on thoughts of his troubled past and uncertain future and be ready to live happily in the present, with you.